i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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