I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
