i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Sext me about skeletons
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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