There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
