We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
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