you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
you inspire me to be a worse person
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
