I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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