Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Randomize