The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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