Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
