What a fucking waste of an outfit
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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