Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
We talked him into tasing himself.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
