We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
