we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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