i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
