you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
