If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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