What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm both gender and math confused
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
