Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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