have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
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