I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
