just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm sobbing to NWA
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
