let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
