Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize
