okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Can you bring me the toilet please
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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