i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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