This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
