I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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