He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
third nipple confirmed
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
