i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Randomize
