How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i would punch a child for taco bell
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
