She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
