Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
