Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
