I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
