i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
My vagina just recognized that song.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
