She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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