Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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