We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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