thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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