He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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