4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
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