we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
