Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
