i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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