I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
