she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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