If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
