They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize