New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
All the doctor said was why
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize