I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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