And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize