I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
